Healing & Self-Discovery
We’re all on our own “Odyssey”
Finding our way home, even when the journey has changed us.
A journey through life and healing
A film adaptation of the Greek story of Odysseus brought the Iliad and the Odyssey to mind. The movie, though graphic and somewhat disturbing, made me reflect afterward on the main character and the course of his life. I thought about many people whose stories I have heard, including my own, and how this journey through life and healing feels like a metaphor with similar themes.
In the story as the film tells it, Odysseus, the main character, had a kingdom but had to fight in a war he did not truly want to join, and he ended up away, fighting for many years. He finally defeated Troy, his enemy, through the famous secret weapon—the Trojan Horse. They were victorious, and the city of Troy was devastated. But the toll of war—death, loss, and the cost of winning—scarred him.
He and his men were so eager to return home that they took a different route, one that was cursed. They encountered monsters, death, the loss of more men, the forces of nature, the gods working against them, magic, and eventually the underworld, where they searched for answers. He kept trying to push through every trial, but ended up shipwrecked and losing the last of his men.
“He remembered who he was, his home, who he was connected to, what mattered most to him.”
When remembering feels too painful
The story finds him on an island with the nymph Calypso, having forgotten everything. Each day, Calypso feeds him a flower to keep him there and prevent him from remembering. He wants to remember, but he also does not want to face what happened to him. Remembering is too painful, and he has grown used to life on the island.
Deep down, he knows he has a past life and people he cares about. His story is not over. After many years, he decided to stop eating the flower, remember, face his pain, and build a boat to leave. He surrenders to the gods and his fate as he tries to return home.
Remembering who we are and what matters
He is older, scarred, and traumatized. He had lost himself and forgotten who he was. But as he remembers, he begins to recall who he is, the tragedies that happened, who he loves, and what truly matters.
He faces his pain with the small hope of finding his family, returning home, and being restored—and he does. And his family has been waiting for him and needs him to come home to fight for them. It’s a full circle, a hero’s journey, with pain and tragedy and redemption.
Finding our way home, changed but still ourselves
This is like so many of us: stories with loss and tragedy, getting shipwrecked off our course, losing people we love, losing ourselves, numbing out to avoid pain. This man eventually chose to face his pain, remember instead of numbing, and move towards what he most cared about.
He remembered who he was, his home, who he was connected to, what mattered most to him. He decided to surrender the past and his mistakes, and find his way home—even if he wasn’t the same person as before, changed because of everything that had happened to him.
In the end, he makes things right, fights for himself and his family, his home. And in the end, it is worth it.
About the author
Christina Dell, LMFT
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Christina Dell is the owner of North State Family Therapy in Redding, California. Her areas of expertise include trauma, grief, codependency, family systems, and communication. She is fully EMDR trained and an Advanced Level Brainspotting practitioner, and works with children, teens, and adults.
View full therapist profileYou don’t have to find your way alone.
If this reflection resonates with your own experience of trauma, loss, or feeling disconnected, explore support at North State Family Therapy in Redding.
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